Today has been very mild. I went to work, and Shane stayed at home with Kerry and ran some errands.
No Doctors, no stress, just the simple life! Very nice.
Then this afternoon I received a phone call from a friend who has just started this journey as a carer. Today they had some news that was hard to hear. She asked for my advice about how to mentally handle these situations. I have been pondering this all afternoon and thought I would put in writing for everyone.
Now just remember, these are my private thoughts that run through my head, and these are some strategies that help me cope with the situation. They may seem ridiculous to you, but they work a treat for me. Most of these things I haven't shared with anyone, so, I hope you appreciate this insight!
1. I find mindful practice really helps. It focus's your mind on the present moment and stops you from worrying about what may come. Its easier to focus on being practical and what you need to do to get yourself / loved ones through the day.
2. Whenever I have thoughts about Shane passing away, I turn it into something comical which is very difficult to do. For example: I bring a picture up in my mind of us in old age, nagging at each other with grandpa Shane saying to me "Quit planning my funeral woman!".
3. Breathe. No matter how scared you are.
4. Do / listen / watch things that make you happy.
5. Be grateful for each moment you have together, and for the work others do to help you.
6. This one is the hardest to get your head around, but probably the one most needed in these situations. Learn to accept that all animals die, and we humans are no exception. Some earlier than others admittedly. Be at peace with the possibility of a loved one passing. This takes the extreme fear out of the situation. Whatever happens, happens and we have no control over that, how we live is the only thing we can control.
xx
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